~
Dividends4Life
The Dividend Guy
Dividend Growth Investor
the moneygardener
Stock Market Prognosticator
The Div Guy
Disciplined Investing
Associate Members

Seeking Alpha Certified
Add to Technorati Favorites

Subscribe to Living Off Dividends

RSS

Subscribe via email:



Living Off Dividends's Facebook Profile

EverBank_YPC_NoDebitFee_160x600
EverBank_YPC_NoDebitFee_160x600

Wealth Money Life Network
Fixed Rate Auto Loans

How To Figure Out What To Do With Your Life?

As someone who’s struggled with finding meaning in life, I can understand the frustration young high schoolers feel when they ask me what they should be doing with their life. Unfortunately, I never have a good answer.

But now thanks to Penelope Trunk, I can direct them to this page and get them off my back:

There is no other way to figure out where you belong than to make time to do it and give yourself space to fail, give yourself time to be lost. If you think you have to get it right the first time, you won’t have the space really to investigate, and you’ll convince yourself that something is right when it’s not. And then you’ll have a quarterlife crisis when you realize that you lied to yourself so you could feel stable instead of investigating. Here’s how to avoid that outcome.

1. Take time to figure out what you love to do.

When I graduated from college, I was shocked to find out that I just spent 18 years getting an education and the only jobs offered to me sucked. Everything was some version of creating a new filing system for someone who is important.

Often bad situations bring on our most creative solutions. And this was one of those times: I asked myself, “What do I want to do most in the world, if I could do anything?” I decided it was to play volleyball, so I went to Los Angeles to figure out how to play on the professional beach circuit.

I spent my days on the courts, and late nights at the gym, and in between, I worked odd jobs in bookstores. And then I realized that the other thing I wanted to do was read. I had been so stifled in school being told what to read all the time. It was thrilling to be able to read whatever I wanted.

I wasn’t making very much money. Sometimes I couldn’t pay rent, and my landlord hated me. And sometimes I couldn’t afford to wash my clothes and I pretended that bikinis never get dirty. But, in fact, you really don’t need much money to figure out what you love to do, you just need time and space and a willingness to keep yourself busy until something sticks.

2. Take time to figure out what you can get paid for.

It took me a few years to navigate the arcane hierarchy of Southern California beach volleyball, but I finally played on the professional tour. For a summer. And what I found was that I am not nearly as competitive as the top players. I was, at one point, ranked 17, but I can tell you that I never cared as much about my rank as the other women.

What I did excel at, though, was winning sponsors, which, on some level, is what professional sports is all about anyway. I always had better sponsors even than women higher than me in the ranks, and I won partners and trainers by dint of my ability to attract sponsors.

But the truth about professional volleyball is that it is a really tough life. The eight hours a day on the beach starts getting old, and so do the Budweiser commercials I did (totally not fun) to manage to scrape together enough money to support myself.

So I thought to myself: Who is using the skills I have to make money? And I landed on marketing. And I had this boyfriend who was going to hire someone to do marketing at his Internet startup, so I volunteered to do it for free, to get something on my resume. And then I got a job.

3. Watch people around you to figure out who is happy.

I ended up having a pretty big job at a Fortune 500 company running their web site. Don’t get me wrong. It was the earliest days of the Internet, and it actually took more people to redesign my blog recently than it did to launch that Fortune 500 site in the early 90’s.

But anyway, I started climbing the ladder and tons of people wanted to mentor me, to help me get to where they were. And they told me they were happy, but when I watched them, day in and day out, I realized that the people at the top of the ladder were not nearly as happy as I had expected them to be. They tucked their kids into bed from their phones at their desk. They were overdressed constantly and they had hair-trigger tempers for topics that seemed inconsequential to me.

So I went to where coolness seemed to be: At startups.

Now that I’m on my third startup, I can tell you with certainty that if you looked at my life you would not see that I am happy. Running a startup is really high risk and really difficult, and entrepreneurs work longer hours than anyone else. But I’m almost always there to eat diner with my kids, because I control my own hours.

So the final step of finding out where you should be is looking at everyone’s life with a clear lens. Adult life is really hard. Finding out who we are, and finding someone to share our life with, and having kids and still having a life, and being able to pay for all of that: Impossible, really.

So you look around and see who is doing what part of that well. And you pick the sacrifices that they made. Because no life is perfect, but all lives have some things to offer. Be clear on what you’re choosing and what you’re giving up, and don’t pick anyone’s life if they tell you they have everything: they’re lying.

But if you’re already out of college and still don’t know what you want to me, may I suggest considering an MBA at top Business School? ;-)

If you found this post helpful, consider donating to my coffee fund!

[Slashdot] [Digg] [Reddit] [del.icio.us] [Facebook] [Technorati] [Google] [StumbleUpon] Related Posts
  • Rogers Still Bullish On Commodities Jim Rogers recently gave a presentation in Vancouver, Canada where he reiterated his belief that we're in the middle of a commodities bull market. His logic is simple: the supply of paper currencies in increasing while the supply of hard commodities like aluminum and copper is dwindling. He also believes......
  • Top 5 Ways To Go Broke Ever wonder why some people go absolutely broke. Not like Donald Trump who had a negative net worth of a Billion Dollars but still lived lavishly. And maybe not in a totally homeless sort of way, with a shopping cart full of the clothes and tinned food. But so broke......
  • A New Kind Of Nigerian Scam? I recently got an email from a reader that I think I should share with you. It involves a new kind of scam and you need to be aware of it.Hi: I have a question regarding real estate fraud. I have an ad on a website selling my property (for......

Related Websites
  • Ways Of Earning Online If you want to earn money from home and organize your own business through Internet, I can share with you with some information. Hope you will find it useful. Custom made web sites, banners, and flash-technologies. It is enough to type in the searcher a phrase from this heading, and......
  • Twitter Jobs - Internet Marketing That's "Different" How many of you regularly use Twitter as part of your overall Internet Marketing strategy? Twitter has taken a lot of heat in recent months as "not being too great for business", because apparently there are too many spammy users on Twitter now who are using it as a tool......
  • Empower Network - Crashed And Burned Already? Empower Network - We Blew It Up! [/caption] We grew to 10,000 people over night. OVER NIGHT! Okay not over night, like a month :)  Simply put the databases couldn't handle that kind of growth. I never seen a company as open as what is here in Empower Network.  You......

[All content is copyright of Living Off Dividends & Passive Income]

Related Posts

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

13 Responses to “How To Figure Out What To Do With Your Life?”

  1. Hi,

    It is never easy figuring what you want to do with your life and how you want to end it.

    But one thing for sure, what we are today are the decisions we made yesterday. Like what you have pointed out, it is wise to list down all the routes you can take and decide on the course that you will take without looking back …

    Rendell
    BrandlessBlog.com

  2. What a wonderful story. Very inspiring. It is nice to hear transparent stories about different activities you know nothing about. That being Pro Volleyball for me.

    Yes, MBA is something I am about to start on in March. I feel very content about, especially since I discovered I qualify for additional G.I. Bill benefits.

    I think I might go get it at Cal State Long Beach. I graduated with a BA from DeVry but I don’t think I can stand to go spend another few years at that boring campus.

    Anyway, thanks for the great post. I love this blog, it is one of my favorites. It is also where I get most of my inspiration from.

  3. Calll me old school, but shouldn’t you just LINK to a good article, rather than copying it onto your site?

  4. DeVry is a joke…it’s similar to Univ of Phoenix.

  5. Well thanks a lot! lol That makes me feel like I wasted a lot of time and money. DeVry isn’t that bad, but that is why I am going CSLB for my MBA.

  6. Ben, sorry to burst your bubble but if you use the DeVry degree on your resume, most (I wouldn’t say all) managers would probably laugh at that resume. It’s all about accreditation and DeVry, U of Phoenix, Heald College, etc are nothing more than just storefront degree printers. I’m not saying that what you’ve learned won’t help you in the real world but, without WASC accreditation, your DeVry degree is worthless to most professionals out there.

    Hell, even IIT in India is way more popular than your DeVry. I’ve got plenty of those graduates in the Fortune 500 company that I’m currently employed in. Just because Devry has this ‘University’ name in it doesn’t mean it’s comparable with, say, Cal State East Bay (used to be Hayward).

    I would be surprised if CSLB considers DeVry BS degree as a BS degree for MBA pre-req. But good luck on applying though.

  7. Chris, I don’t think it is as bad as you say it is. Also, most of the people I have met who graduated from DeVry are pretty sharp.

    I will find out Monday if any of my credits will transfer. That is going to suck if they don’t. You are right, DeVry is not accredited by the WASC but they are accredited by a regional association, The North Central Association. I am not sure how much that matters but we will see.

    Which fortune 500 company do you work for? Also, where did you get your degree?

  8. Living Off Dividends Says:

    I’m sure it can’t be that bad. I’ve 2 people from DeVry. One was a programmer and the other was an IT guy. Both of them were extremely intelligent and very capable. The programmers husband went to UCSD to get a bachelors in Computer Engineering. Since he spent an extra 2 years studying and she spent 2 years working, when he graduated he was making the same money as she was.

    Even if it’s not accredited, if you go and talk to professors or admissions staff and they like you, they can move mountains to get you admitted.

  9. Just graduated college about two weeks ago. I’ve come to realize that trying to figure out exactly what you want to do in life is a waste of time, no one really ever does. What people need to learn how to do is to figure out what direction they want to head in. I’ve always knew that I wanted to retire at a young age, but I couldn’t have predicted the opportunities that have arrived to get me closer to my goal.

  10. Ben, to answer your questions, Cisco and BS from the current school that LOD is attending right now although I also have a MS.

    LOD, there are some bright high school graduates that are billionaires and I’m pretty sure you know at least 2 of them by name. I never said that college will help you become successful. However, I will say that the *right* college will help somewhat. UCLA, frankly, didn’t help me one iota as I graduated during a horrible recession (’91). Even a Harvard degree won’t help everyone in this current recession.

    It might be true that some DeVry graduates are intelligent and can easily outperform some regular WASC accredited college graduates work-wise. As a matter of fact, I know coworkers who are more intelligent than I am and they don’t even graduate from some of the higher ranked universities in this country. However, that accreditation is an important factor not only for grad schools but also for employers alike. I’m simply being honest and present matter-of-fact statements and I’m sure many (again, not all) college admission and HR employees would agree with me on this.

    Perhaps I should have simply recalled my first comment. Let me do that then.

  11. Chiko, retiring at a young age is possible. You need to do the following:

    1. Save, save, save.
    2. Spend like a starving student.
    3. Play the stock/bond/derivative/SIV/CDO/hedge market, etc, only if you tolerate the potential losses. Otherwise, listen to Einstein and his thought on the greatest invention in human history.
    4. Try repeating #1 and #2 as if your life depends on them :-)

    Good luck.

  12. Chris,
    Is that the steps you took to retire early yourself?

  13. Hi Tom,

    Yes, that’s my method (plus the 120k income for the past 10+ years helped as well). Fortunately, my wife is better than me in terms of #1 and #2.

    I have lost quite a bit in terms of dollar amount in #3 but the % loss is tolerable. Otherwise, there’s not that much that I made other than bond divs, CD interests, and was quite lucky in the RE bubble.

    I don’t think anyone can retire in US unless he/she has about $3 million in total asset (most of it in cash at this point) since health care in this country is so expensive. Otherwise, with $1 million (again, most in cash), you can practically retire in most countries in the world if you can cover adequate health care cost in your monthly dividend equation.

    Good luck.

Leave a Reply